ILLUMINATED CODE FROM SPACE
Bioartis Haari Tesla (behance) - "Macrocosm and microcosm is an ancient Greek Neo-Platonic schema of seeing the same patterns reproduced in all levels of the cosmos, from the largest scale (macrocosm or universe-level) all the way down to the smallest scale (microcosm or sub-sub-atomic or even metaphysical-level). In the system the midpoint is Man, who summarizes thecosmos." - I was doing some researches and I found experiment with miniatures of space so I decided to try my own. The result has been nebulae, galaxies and supernovae transformed into microorganism.
These last few weeks whenever I am heading to my house at night, or leaving for school in the morning, I feel like everything is complete utter sh*t. Now notice i said “house” and i did not say “home”. I speak and think this for the sole reason that I have no home. I live in a house. I get a roof over my head and that is it… I don’t get three square meals a day, I do not get to bathe and keep proper hygiene, seriously I don’t even get to sleep at night.
I do everything in my power that I possibly can to avoid having to go there, I avoid it like the plague. It is sad but true; it is my personal hell-hole, complete with alcoholics and deadbeats. Sometimes, I fantasize about calling the police, just to see how things might play out. Would they save me from this inferno? Would they save me from her?
I think these things every morning and night, and it is quite peculiar. It is peculiar in a sense that at first I felt bad thinking/saying these things, but I’ve come to realize I am only admitting to my feelings, and there is nothing wrong with admitting your honest emotions on a subject so dear. But not, now I feel nothing. I still hold hatred for those in that house, and have even grown angry towards the dwelling itself. It is not your fault, it is not anyone’s fault really.
Tell me honestly, am I thinking too much about the negative? There is not very much positive to work with here. Am I just alone with myself too long?
am i alone?